Mug Shots

The following were taken from actual incident reports filed last week by the City of Charleston Police Department. These are not convictions and the names of businesses, complainants, and suspects have been left off to protect the innocent. All suspects are  innocent until proven guilty, of course.
June 29 | Simple assault
A physician’s assistant told police that a man admitted to the emergency room had spit in his face after he wouldn’t prescribe anything stronger than a Motrin for the patient’s pain. The man became aggressive and agitated, “bowing” in front of staff and doctors. When the PA held up his hand to say I don’t want to fight, the man punched his hand. Staff restrained the man, who wanted narcotics, apparently. The patient then spit into the PA’s face, saying, “I have hepatitis-C … I hope you get it, too.” The man was later placed in psychiatric care at the hospital.
June 29 | Burglary
A manager at a Shelby Ray Court fast food restaurant called police after finding the two front glass doors of the business shattered. A review of security camera footage found a man dressed in black smashing the door with a crowbar, entering the restaurant, and making for its two safes. The man tried unsuccessfully to pry the two safes open before breaking into a locked drawer and leaving.
June 29 | Attempted suicide
A man called police, saying that he believed his niece may have just attempted suicide. When police arrived at the woman’s Stinson Drive residence, she didn’t respond to knocks at the front or back doors. Getting inside, police went upstairs and found the woman somewhat unresponsive in a bedroom with the shower running. She told police that she’d taken medicine in an attempt to harm herself.
June 29 | Missing person
A S. Sherwood woman told police that her boyfriend, the father of their child, had been missing for over 24 hours. The threesome had been asked to leave a nearby pool the day before, and the boyfriend took out his skateboard from their car and said he would get home on his own. The man has a history of depression and suicidal thoughts.
June 29 | Bad check
A Preakness Stakes man told police that he’d received a $1,500 cashier’s check from a company for online data processing he’d completed for them. He’d taken the check and cashed it successfully at his local bank. Having spent all but $300 of the check, the bank manager called and said the check was fraudulent.
June 30 | Shoplifting
A manager at a Sam Rittenberg clothing store spotted a customer allegedly shoplifting four fedoras by concealing them in his clothes and walking out the door two weeks before. He told police he didn’t call then because he knew the alleged shoplifter “would be coming back.” Last week, the man returned, and was spotted concealing three fedoras and two watches and escaping into a red Lincoln parked outside. Police spotted a Lincoln with the same license plates and stopped the car. The manager of the store was brought to the traffic spot, and said the driver wasn’t the man he’d seen shoplifting; the driver said he had lent the car earlier to his wife’s cousin.