Here Kitty, Kitty

Folks, as of a week or so ago I have another mouth to feed. Please do not send cigars or letters of congratulations. Instead, send cat food. The cheap store brands work fine. Long time readers will remember that I feed stray cats every morning at about 5:30 a.m. Bob Tail was my first little waif and White Blaze followed a month or so later. Well, they must have gone and blabbed because now New Kitty has joined the herd awaiting my arrival.
This is starting to get expensive and so I’ve started looking for part time work. I’m pretty handy with tools and have swung many a hammer in my day. Common, finishing, and roofing nails are no strangers. When I saw a business with a “Help Wanted” sign, I thought I had the job sewn up. I confidently strode into the establishment and stated my abilities. How was I to know that my experience meant nothing to the beauty shop that advertised an opening for a “Nail Tech?”
Another potential job to explore is at a local church that will soon be holding a turkey shoot. Now, this is not like the one in the movie “Sergeant York,” where they shoot at live birds. It’s not even going to be a modern one where the closest bird shot to the paper bull’s eye wins the prize. No, this is advertised as a “Nerf” turkey shoot. Perhaps I might rent a turkey costume and offer my services for a small fee. It cannot be too painful to be hit by a sponge projectile. I wouldn’t just stand still and make it overly easy to tag me. I would give them their money’s worth by bobbing and weaving. It might just be a fun way to earn some pet food money.
I hope the above appeases one of my publishers who asked me to lighten up on some of my comments. I figured I could not go wrong with writing about kittens and non-lethal sporting activities. Maybe he will add some slack to my short leash as I try to continue to write on serious topics.
On that last note, anyone breathing air and not drinking the Kool Aid has by now heard of Jonathan Gruber. He’s the braniac who was hired for magabucks by the current administration to help construct Obamacare. Well. the guy has now come out and said it was all a sham. He’s on record and video stating that the passage of that terrible legislation depended upon lies and the stupidity of the American people to believe that this train wreck was a great idea. Who did he and his ilk fool?
No republican voted for this mess. Ergo they were not the targeted saps. Who does that leave? You guessed it. The democrats in power got their fellow small-brained democrats to embrace this with open arms and hollow heads. These liberals will kneel at the feet of anyone who offers bread and circuses. I’ve always thought it is better to stand for something worthwhile than to bow down to something that is not..
James David Altman lives in West Ashley and has been a contributing columnist for several publications.  He’s the son of the late former S.C. Republican House of Representative of John Graham Altman III. You can reach him at rabidreb@gmail.com.